Verde mar

It’s 8 pm and I’m driving home from the restaurant . A luxury I haven’t enjoyed for a very long time.
Dinner with dad was cozy as always. The older I get the more I really appreciate family time. My dad, brother and his girlfriend were all pleasantly talking the whole evening away. Most of the time I wasn’t really listening what everyone was saying as I was caught in the moment by looking into their eyes and changed facial features. Noticing how time, life transformed us, yet we’re all somehow still the same. Realizing how lucky I am to have this family I felt my heart expanding with love and admiration for how much we all have grown~together.
It’s a hot late-summer night and the moon is out, it’s almost a full moon, and she’s looking so big and pretty I feel like I could just reach out my car window and hug her. I rolled all the windows down, to let the wind blow my hair, making it into tangles. While listening to the soul stirring music of Chambao I decide to take the long way home. Driving just makes me feel so free. I can remember those days I would just get in my car and drove just for the heck of it.
I treasure anything that makes me feel free. Driving, cuts away constraints, makes life simple and leaves me worry free and confident to go on adventures. It gives me choices. When I drive it’s me who gets to decide where and when to go.

The song Verde Mar comes on. I feel a rush of emotion moving through me. The words of the song, the sound of her voice, the guitar, all while driving into the magical full moon night somehow feels so intense. I pull over to the side of the road. I turn up the volume and put my head on the steering wheel. I close my eyes so I can concentrate on the beautiful lyrics and the emotions it stirs.
I take a deep inhale while feeling every word resonate inside my body. The air in my lungs becomes sweeter and I feel a sharp shot of happiness, straight up my body into the air overhead. Contemplating, feeling, smiling, remembering,…

Music is medicine.

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I keep praying to be able to love better, to be open to a love bigger than my little self can channel alone, so that I can be, it sounds so egotistical, but… a conduit of it for others, for them to feel loved, too. Actually, ‘How may I serve’ and ‘Thank You’ are my only loud and conscious requests as of late.

Realizing it’s difficult, to trust your heart in this day and age, to open it, even to the divine.

There is so much beauty in the world. And the greatest shame is missing those sweet opportunities~not taking the time to pull over to the side of the road to allow yourself to bathe in it….and that in those opportunities it becomes evident what a small role we really play.

There’s so much soaring freedom in this reality. Even in these mundane routinious days lately, these weeks, despite their monotonous flavor, are bright winking stars in my universe, forming important constellations that will tell me about my life. I will feel grateful for them, looking back, trying to understand my path of existence.
It feels awfully amazing and full to feel grateful for them now, too.

Enjoyyyyyy:  Verde Mar~Chambao

Verde mar, gotas del cielo caía
Eres tú, quien al oído me decía

Una luz, que mi alma iluminó

Eres tu, el de las palabra bellas
El que me enseñó el camino

Sin salir de mi destino

Eres tú, eres tú

El que solo con palabras

Conquistó mi corazón

Quiéreme, dime que nunca te irás
Que podré seguir soñando

Que podré seguir amando

Eres tú, eres tú

El que solo con palabras

Conquistó mi corazón

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